Sometimes I struggle...
I noticed that lately when I sit around on the floor and watch my kids play, I feel a slight resentment. Like I should be doing something better with my life. Like I'm just wasting time and could be doing the laundry, sewing, working on my websites.
I didn't feel this way when my first 3 were small. I sat around with them and played and didn't think twice about it. I also didn't have 3 business to run, a house to clean and homeschooling to do.
Nevertheless, I tell myself that I'm a stay at home mom for a reason. I don't want someone else raising my kids. I don't want to miss the firsts. I would miss my kids and do enjoy being around them all day (for the most part). They are so creative and make me so proud everyday. But I also feel happy to have my businesses. To chat with other moms with the same interests and feel like I'm providing some great services, whether to help spotlight work at home children's clothing designers or make some super squishy diapers, it's important to me.
I guess I just need to focus on the fact that my kids are only small for such a short time and I want to enjoy them. To not get upset when I'm laying on the floor and they are crawling and jumping all over me and I have other "work" to do. To stop and watch the beautiful children God gave me. I know I will want these days back when they are all grown up.
So there...my struggle put into words. I already feel better and ready to face tomorrow. I hope it's sunny and we can go for a walk together. Who cares about the laundry ;) it won't go anywhere.
I didn't feel this way when my first 3 were small. I sat around with them and played and didn't think twice about it. I also didn't have 3 business to run, a house to clean and homeschooling to do.
Nevertheless, I tell myself that I'm a stay at home mom for a reason. I don't want someone else raising my kids. I don't want to miss the firsts. I would miss my kids and do enjoy being around them all day (for the most part). They are so creative and make me so proud everyday. But I also feel happy to have my businesses. To chat with other moms with the same interests and feel like I'm providing some great services, whether to help spotlight work at home children's clothing designers or make some super squishy diapers, it's important to me.
I guess I just need to focus on the fact that my kids are only small for such a short time and I want to enjoy them. To not get upset when I'm laying on the floor and they are crawling and jumping all over me and I have other "work" to do. To stop and watch the beautiful children God gave me. I know I will want these days back when they are all grown up.
So there...my struggle put into words. I already feel better and ready to face tomorrow. I hope it's sunny and we can go for a walk together. Who cares about the laundry ;) it won't go anywhere.
posted by amy at 9:18 PM
4 Comments:
I'm glad you feel the same too sometimes. I do have a parttime job. But when I'm at home and play with them, I sometimes think too: 'I should better be doing this, or that.." And then I realize that indeed it's only a short period they are so small and I do enjoy every moment with them.
amy, i am sure your thoughts are very common. and you are right, you ARE staying home with them for a reason, and you will all be blessed exponentially for it. my dad gave up so many typical worldy "opportunities" to be there for my sister and me...and we are just eternally grateful.
teri
Well, this post of your helped me. It's good to be reminded that they are only little for so long. Thanks Amy :)
I have felt those exact feelings:) It's been a process over the last fourteen years for me to find balance as a wife and a mother, and a woman in general. I also experience more joy in my children than anything else this world has to offer, but have found myself wanting to "do" more, to contribute more to society, more to my family's income, etc. I realize, though, that by giving my children the very best of myself that I AM giving something else to society. I am raising up children who will love and respect others and not be a burden on our society. And then one day, they will do the same thing. They will bring wonderful blessings into this world that they will shape and mold into the people that God has created them to be...I'm glad I stumbled upon your blog, BTW:) I've been fascinated with your wham business and how your are able to juggle that and also home school all of your little ones. Whew! After reading your entries, I can see why you are so prosperous in what you do. It seems that God has truly blessed the work of your hands:)
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